10 years ago I had the privilege of meeting a 5 year old. He forever changed my life. He also has changed how I look at kids who have “attitudes”. As I have walked with this young man I wish I could turn back the hands of time and help him more. To love him was just not enough. His anger and hatred for the world and all authority has eaten him alive.
I remember one day the school giving us this answer when we asked if he could be tested for the gifted program: “when he gets his anger under control, then we will test him”.
Why do I bring this young man to the forefront of my blog today? Because I have 3 more years to try and reach him before he becomes a legal adult and I DO NOT want him to become a resident of our Correctional system. He has a great heart but growing up for so long in a fatherless home and then to grow up with a stepfather that has no rights to even tell him to clean his room (according to our state system), it seems that everyone has given up and said “well he’s going to just end up like his dad”.
Today I taught 135 men in the Ohio Prison. It was an amazing time teaching and I love what I do… but God stopped me in my tracks and said “what about the children? You can still help save the children.” During the talk I asked how many of the men were dads? About 90% or 122 men were dads. That means at least 122 children are growing up fatherless. At the end of the talk Rob (my awesome husband) asked the guys to go back to page 2 which was the genogram. As they turned there, Rob asked the question: “when your children get older what is their genogram going to say about you?” You can change today if you want.
As we finished our drive today in silence my heart was breaking. I wanted to scream and cry. What about the children? When we got to our hotel I started searching for the facts about children who live in fatherless homes and I am going to tell you the statistics scared me.
• 5 times more likely to commit suicide
• 32 times more likely to run away
• 20 times more likely to have behavioral disorders
• 14 times more likely to commit rape
• 9 times more likely to drop out of high school
• 10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances
• 9 times more likely to end up in a state-operated institution
• 20 times more likely to end up in prison
Now for another stat:
Men and women who are incarcerated, their children are 70% more likely to end up in the Correctional system also. Not 70% of them will end up, but they have a 70% greater possibility of ending up in the correctional system.
But I already knew these statistics I just did not know the numbers. How did I know these stats existed because I have lived it for the past 10 years doing inner city ministry. I have seen my share of the behavioral issues just as I stated at the beginning but I do not put these stats here for you to say “oh poor baby”. I wrote this in hopes you will join me in being an Image Builder for a child or a 180 person for a teen or adult. Before you decide let me finish with what I am asking of you.
How do we fix the problem: RELATIONSHIPS: Relationships with the fathers to teach them how to be good dads. RELATIONSHIPS: Relationships with the mothers to teach them how to be good moms. In the 180 Program we talk about getting a “Board of Directors”, well it’s going to take YOUR time and effort to make this successful. And how do we reach the kids? Its by becoming an Image Builder in your local school. Working with a child who is academically at risk of becoming one of the statistics mentioned above.
So it all boils down to 2 things:
1. RELATIONSHIPS
2. EDUCATION

Are you in? For more information please contact us: info@atghope.org home of the 180 Program and the Image Builders Program.